Sometimes it helps if she holds the dam in place while you apply tongue strokes, but probably the best solution is simply to get comfortable holding the barrier in place with one hand while using your free hand to manually stimulate her. I know that doesn't solve your problem, so I'm going to suggest that you approach the challenge in a new way: rather than focus on how to “free up” your hands, focus on how best to stimulate her clitoral cluster while using your hands to keep the barrier in place.

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• Start with a dildo (a soft, plastic replica of the male penis that comes in various sizes and textures); buy one with a thick tapered head (at least a couple of inches in diameter) that will fit snugly inside her vaginal entrance.

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• Insert the head of the dildo (the first couple of inches) into her vaginal entrance. It should fill her without being uncomfortable, and expand the area of her frenulum, as would happen during intercourse. Most important, the dildo should remain secure inside her without requiring the assistance of your hands.

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• Hold the dental dam in place and use your thumbs to massage her frenulum while you apply tongue strokes to the clitoral head.

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Apply delicate tongue strokes to the clitoral head; her clitoral cuff should tighten around the dildo, particularly if you've introduced it after building up substantial sexual tension.

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